Applications should be completed in blue or black ink

I had been putting off replying to Pacer for more than a week. You may remember him as the one who wanted to take it slow, meaning he wanted to spend a considerable amount of time getting to know each other via e-mail.

Admittedly, I told him that I'd go along with his preference and answer some of his questions. I did that a bit with the first exchange of e-mails. It took him awhile to get back to me. He sent to successive e-mails, one full of questions, the second saying he was discontinuing his membership and to contact him via a private e-mail address.

I put off contacting him because I was honestly a bit put off by the first of the two e-mails. It was literally a list of questions with nothing about himself.

Where are you from originally? and where were you born? Where did you go to college, and what did you major in? Where is your family currently located and how often do you see them?

You seem to travel quite a bit for your job. Do you mind describing what it is you do for a living, and how long have you been in your current line of work? Do you enjoy what you do? How much time/effort to you split between home and office?

Maybe I should just attach a resume or something for him. At least that's how I felt after reading his run-on list of questions. There wasn't much else to the e-mail other than Pacer saying to take my time replying. It reminds me of filling out an application and essays for graduate school. Been there, done that. This isn't the same. I joke that dating is like looking for a job, but you can't literally treat it as such (I don't).

His approach comes across to me as very cold and impersonal. Perhaps I'm overreacting. This format feels like an arranged marriage or somethiing. Couldn't he dress it up in a more friendly, narrative form where he offers a little about himself to break up the tone? It's not that I mind answering these questions, I just think they'd be better as part of a phone call or a chat over coffee. He probably live less than 15 miles away. What's the big deal?

I don't want to be hypocritical about the process, so I felt an obligation to write him rather than just disappear and never be heard from again. I'm trying my best to express my needs in a non-demanding way to people. In response, I wrote him this:

As much as I'm curious to get to know you, this feels too impersonal to me. While I recognize that online dating can be a very tedious process, I think maintaining a conversational tone is important and this is more like filling out an application.

Hmmm, a bit harsh huh? I ended by saying that I'd be opening to exploring a compromise between his style and my preference to meet if possible. Honestly, I don't know that there is one. I know at this age it makes sense to be more efficient about the dating process. It probably partially explains his approach, but this just takes the fun out of it.

Well, I guess we'll see if he bothers to write me back. I'm sure he's been talking with a few other women so maybe he's already made his choice and I needn't worry about it.

... and then... there's this mean-spirited part of me that wants to answer his questions with wild answers to see how he reacte to a non-traditional person. But I couldn't do that.