Thursday, July 20, 2006

The potential

I finally received information back from the speed dating event. I guess you could say it was a 100% success rate as I matched with the two people I circled on my worksheet at the end of that night. Being old-fashioned when it comes to dating, I'm waiting to hear from them. Now comes the true test of whether they just marked me for kicks or really want to get to know me.

6 comments:

Anna May Won't said...

yay, 2 matches! better than being kicked in the stomach.

zerodoll said...

i second the yay! that seems like a good sign, i doubt most people would mark interest if they weren't. how do they contact you? via email?

Pandax said...

Yes, we get an e-mail that says the following people wanted to get to know you better (and I indicated wanting to know them better). I get their e-mail address, they receive mine. Usually the guys write, unless they forgot who you are and/or aren't sure anymore about wanting to chat. (It has been a week.)

Meowkaat said...

Wow, I am just fascinated by the idea of speed-dating. I live in the Middle Of Nowhere and such a thing has not started here yet. I wish I knew more about it- what's the next step? If you both pick each other, do you get info about each other and is it up to you from then on, or does the organzier have anything to do with it anymore?
I'm commenting because of your last post where you (basically) gave permission to do so if we stay nice.
I find your blog thought-provoking and very interesting, it's one of my favorites to check in with.

Pandax said...

Hi, Kaat. Thanks for your comments. I'm always open to discussion - negative and positive. I just don't like rudeness.

Here's my shot at explaining the process:

The format varies slightly depending on the organizer. Basically, there are x number of females and x number of men. Each person is given a number. There might be ten minutes or so to mingle before the "dates" start. People sometimes attend with a friend. You start at the table that matches your number. Then, it starts. You chat with the guy across from you for 3-5 minutes. When the bell rings, you thank each other for the conversation. He gets up and moves to the next table; a new guy sits down in front of you. Somewhere in that ten seconds between guys you frantically try and note something (a key word like "Biker from Maryland") that will help you remember who you talked to a second ago.

You'll need that because after you've talked with x guys, it's hard to remember everyone. Then you're expected to fill out a sheet of paper. You write down the names of all the guys you met and either circle "yes" or "no" next to it. That is your indication of whether or not you would like to get to know them more. The organizers collects your sheet of paper as you leave the bar.

About a week later, you receive an e-mail. The rule is that interest must be mutual - both people must circle "yes" for a match to occur. It makes sense that your e-mail wouldn't be given out to someone you didn't express interest in. All that is provided is their number from the speed dating and an e-mail address. That's it. There's no other information available. This is also why making a few notes on people helps if you intend on communicating again. Maybe it's different if someone like Match.com organizes an event since each person would likely have a profile to look up. (Just my guess.)

It's now in the hands of you and your matches to contact each other. No one's going to check on you, no one is going to know what happened beyond that night except you and the guy. Either person can start the conversation. It is an extreme case of making decisions based on first impressions.

And so now, I wait... hope this helped.

P.S. I've also heard of dating in the dark - essentially speed dating with the lights off, and there's silent dating where you must communicate by writing messages on 3x5 note cards. I don't know anything else about these formats.

Meowkaat said...

WOW. I find that totally fascinating. Your description was concise and perfectly understandable, thank you.