Back from a pleasant holiday

Time with the family was nice. It's hard to complain when the weather is a sunny 68F almost every day.

I caught up with a childhood friend, Dogger. We attended 3rd through 12th grade together. She's now a pediatrician. Dogger is also one of the few friends who is still single. It was nice to catch up on our family and friends. I learned that another one of our high school friend's is pregnant. It's taken her many years to decide whether or not to have children. She had never wanted them when we were younger.

Dogger was a bit tired after holding a party at her house the previous night. Her guests had brought their children. The kids left a big mess around the house. She said they had thrown food everywhere. She paused and commented that she wasn't used to that and maybe it's better not to have kids. I know she didn't really mean it. I brushed her observation off as the fault of the parents rather than an unfortunate truth about children. I didn't want to admit that I had been thinking something similar. It would seem as we get older, the idea of catering to children becomes more foreign. I wondered if this was her way of comforting herself about being childless.

At least, that's how my mind's been working lately. If we rationalize the hassle, inconvenience, and selfishness of having children perhaps we can make ourselves believe that it's good that we're childless. I think about all the pollution, crime, materialism, etc. in the world and wonder why I would want to subject a child to this self-destructing world. I console myself by believing that bringing a child into this world is a cruel thing.

The next evening I visited with my oldest friend, Sis. As children, we were the only Asian girls in the neighborhood. Everyone thought we were sisters (because why else would there be two Asian girls in the neighborhood). She and J got engaged after knowing each other for four months. She got married last year and is now expecting her first child.

I'm always curious how the two of them get along since they knew so little of each other to start. They've definitely had their share of fights and disagreements. He's not too keen on how much time she spends with her white, drinking friends. He generally doesn't like large groups of people and prefers to just be with her. It was honest but surprising to hear her reflect upon her marriage as basically having a roommate. They are in the apartment together but usually in separate rooms, one watching tv, the other working at the desk. We agreed that living with someone gets more difficult with age.

It was fun to see her pregnant. She's not particular enamoured with the pregnancy experience but managing. The reality of the impending baby hasn't quite hit them yet. They have yet to agree on a name. She wants to have a biblical name, he does not. The funny thing about that? He's studying to be a Protestant minister.

On the weekend, I caught up with another pregnant girlfriend, Nvy. This will be her second child. It was more of a threesome as her little girl, Ruby, was along for the afternoon. It was fun to hold her hand and help her cross the street. She's an incredibly intelligent two-year-old recognizing a select portion of the alphabet, learning basic colors, and counting from one to twenty. I was impressed by how well Ruby's developed. I can only hope I can do half as a good a job raising such a smart and well-behaved child.

It's amazing how many facets there are to living life. I really cherish the time I spent with my girlfriends. Listening and asking questions gave me a lot to think about. No one's life is perfect but they all have such interesting stories to tell.

My mom was pretty good. There's some tension between her and my dad that I won't go into. Overall, we had a great time as a family. There was no drama because of my brother's wedding, no money complaints, and the job doesn't matter so much these days because she's about to retire. We went shopping at the mall and she bought me a couple nice pieces of clothing. We both loved buying brand name items for 20% of the retail price. It was just a great vacation at home.