Almost getting what you asked for

When I'm in a bad mood, feeling depressed about life, I have sometimes expressed to myself a desire to be hit by a car. Pain begets the desire for more pain I suppose.

Over the weekend, I was continuing my holiday shopping. Going from the bookstore to the farmers' market, I waited at a small left turn signal on El Camino Real. Normally the turn onto Ph St. would be a simple turn lane with the choice left up to the driver. Since the street is parallel to two major streets, I guess the city decided a traffic signal would be safer.

So I sat waiting for my light to change to green. The light one half block ahead was red. I figured I would have my turn before the three-lane onslaught rolled through their intersection to block my path. To my surprise, however, their light turned green while I stared at my red light.

The herd of cars passed me by. I didn't really pay much attention since I figured it would be a good couple minutes before my turn came. After a small gap in the flow of cross traffic, my light turned green. I was surprised that it would let me go when there was another small group of cars headed towards me. But it seemed the cars were slowing down, so I pulled out.

As my car went forward about 50 ft. I heard some honking. I continued taking my left turn and checked my mirror to see what the commotion was about. In my rear view, I saw two lanes of cars stopped at the light, but in the third lane (nearest to the median), was a car in the middle of the intersection. The woman in the passenger seat was looking towards me in a daze.

In those few seconds as I finished crossing El Camino Real and drove down Ph, I slowly processed what just happened. I looked back again to see the cars that had stopped move again, though the honking car seemed to still be sitting in the road. At first, I was mad that they had honked at me, after all, I had the right of way.

Then, I second guessed myself and wondered if I had misread the traffic signal. Had I driven recklessly? But then why would the other two cars have stopped at the road mark? I'm sure I saw the green light illuminated. Should I have turn around to confront the car? Were they stopped waiting for me to come back to talk with them?

In my state of confusion and oblivion, I drove another four blocks to my destination, though admittedly more cautiously. I sat in my car for a moment. Based on the few facts I had gathered from that incident, one of two possibilities seems most likely:

1) The honking car had not seen the red light since it was not an obvious "T" intersection and slammed on their brakes to stop after running the red.

2) Both lights were green and the incidence should be reported so that the city can fix the light.

I wasn't scared but certainly concerned. Fortunately, nothing happened, there was no contact. Imagine what could have happened. They likely would have hit me square in the side of my car or clipped the back trunk area. My air bags would have deployed and the car possibly would have spun around. It would have been a nasty way to start the day.

There's no way to know how serious the accident would have been, but I think about it. Now, I think I shouldn't wish to be in a car accident. Driving is a dangerous activity that people take for granted. I'll be watching cars more carefully for awhile (especially this time of year) and waiting a little longer before pulling out in front of opposing traffic.