Monday, April 02, 2007

You have to have at least one

This is an e-mail conversation the day before we went skiing:

From me to UBCHula:
"The sporting store still has the $44 lift vouchers. I'll pick up 6 at lunch. I forgot to ask if there's a limit."

UBCHula to me:
"Can you let me know how this goes? (Is there a limit?) I live right by there so I can pick up the other 6 after work."

Me to UBCHula with a cc to TJ:
"They have plenty. I took six. Since they are just vouchers, you don't need to pay anything. We'll pay when we arrive at the resort. She wants sure about any limit, though I probably wouldn't ask for more than eight."

Reply from TJ:
"If they're just vouchers, there's no risk in getting a bunch for everyone,

UBCHula, if they'll let you get 18 more then we'll cover everyone for both
days. Let me know how many you're able to grab and I'll send an email to people
so they don't go pick up more...


Excuse me, EIGHTEEN! Yes, they're free but don't you think the people at the store would find that request rather ridiculous? I wrote back saying so much in a polite way and *suggested* that TJ still ask another person to volunteer to stop by the store.

Then I called Tim. I told him the errand that I'd just run and the follow-up e-mail exchange. My tone clearly showed my annoyance and ridicule of TJ's thinking.

Tim's reaction was, "Yeah, sure 18 tickets. No problem. I'll go in, ask for 10 and come back into the store and ask for eight more. Then, my girlfriend will ask to borrow your ski clothing because you're the same size as a friend of hers who could use them for a ski trip you're not invited to."

We laughed. Then Tim whined about having to ride in a car with TJ for four hours. He doesn't relish the idea of having a one-on-one conversation with TJ for that many hours.

It's sad. TJ's been a friend to many of us for some ten years now. We're like family. Unfortunately, over the years, he's also demonstrated a lack of judgement in business and in personal relationships. He tried to make a business out of a pyramid scheme and constantly badgered all of us to subscribe to his services. In the personal arena, he's misled and used a number of women over the years. None of us would ever willingly introduce him to any of our single girlfriends, and he never understood why. Yet, we maintain a friendship with him because he's the reason so many of us are friends today.

These days, I only tend to hear from him if we're having a get together or when he needs something. He never just calls to say "hello." The last time I spoke to him on the phone, he made it sound like he was inviting me to hang out with him and his girlfriend for the evening. The real goal was to find someone from whom they could borrow large stockpots so she could cook. It's fine if you want to come borrow something, but don't disguise it as being friendly and have me drive to you.

I'm sure the world has many people like TJ. It's just that he's the only one in any of my immediate circles. You want to be his friend because of everything you've been through and done together. Yet, you keep a certain arms length from him because you don't trust him motives.

And UBCHula did go to the store and ask for 18 tickets. The sales person asked if he was a member, he said "yes," and he was handed 18 tickets. Everyone was a little surprised that he got what he asked for, but then it's been a bad year for snow around here.

1 comment:

Anonymous Writer said...

Tim's comment made me laugh...mostly because I would have said that out loud to whoever made the suggestion in the first place.