Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Real Hours

Having a *real* full-time job is quite an adjustment. For the past year, I have been getting up at 7:30am and getting home by 5pm. Now, it's back to a schedule I haven't had probably in five years. I actually have to get up like everyone else around 6:30am and return home before 6pm if I'm lucky. (I know, little violins playing in the background full of insincere pity.)

It's totally normal and I'll get used to it. Right now, however, it's darn weird.

If it weren't for virtual files, I'd have a pile of reports and articles to read that stands taller than me (and that's not too hard). Everything feels laid back because my new boss knows that my first month is going to be slow. Still, there's this unsaid pressure to get up to speed and contribute to meetings. Yikes, what did I get myself into?

Throughout my life, I've shied away from big challenges because I hate failing or letting others down. I fear I've put myself in that situation. Everyone I've worked with has always had incredible confidence and faith in my abilities. But I've been away from serious work for so long, I don't know if I remember how to do any critical thinking. And honestly, the wedding is quite distracting.

My group is very friendly. I just hope I can make them like me and not say anything blunt and stupid that's going to make them realize how geeky and awkward I really am. :p

No comments: