Friday, June 10, 2005

Group experiment

So this is more of a flashback to an event I forgot to mention. BAARE events have grown kind of stale for me. But since I wanted to try the speed dating process once, I thought this would be a good opportunity. Somehow it became four of us, Is, Jw, EH, and me.

We all met near the Mont station where EH's sister kindly picked us up and drove us down to the bar where the event was being held. AS we arrived the fobish guy pulled up in his bright blue Nissan Z. He parked it directly out front of the place. All I could think was "insecure Asian nerd complex." He wasn't a very attractive guy be it his grooming or clothing.

The four of us sat around a bar table very apprehensive and skeptical of the whole situation. Sure enough, Mr. Z tried to come over and talk with us. Ugh. I know it's bad to judge by looks but he just seemed so dull. I think we all felt bad but we just didn't want to talk to him. Going off to the bathroom helped to shake him.

Some other guys who approached us were much more sociable. Speed dating itself often creates a very artificial mode of talking. Most of the guys seemed fine, but I'd have to say that there was no one in particular that caught my attention.

There were actually several guys I recognized before the dating started. This is why I hadn't been to an event in awhile. I was hoping to get a fresher batch of men to meet. I said "hi" to PL, a guy who I've now met three times at these events. The funny thing is both of us admitted that this was the first one we participated in in probably a year. What kind of coincidence is that?

I think we met some 22 guys that night. The one thing I don't like about the format is the randomness of the people and the sheer numbers. This particular organization allows everyone to meet everyone. It's overwhelming and exhausting.

Is and me ended up sitting in a little lounge area for the event. Jw and EH were around the corner at two bar tables. This would be interesting consider we could compare notes afterwards. Is would be the first of the four of us to encounter most of the guys are they were traveling in a counter-clockwise format.

admittedly it's been awhile. Vin seemed like a decent guy. He was very friendly and sociable with both of us. I think Is determined that he was decently close to us in age though he didn't look it. A group of good looking guys came together. In the end I found out that all knew the organizer and had been coaxed there. After our post-dating discussions we figured most of them we just having fun there and not really serious.

I remet one guy whom I had matched with last June. Although I exchanged a few e-mails I never met up with him because he lives across the bay. Plus I was already dealing with dates with three or four other fellows at the time and couldn't handle it. He seems like a decent guy, but somehow he didn't grab enough attention.

One guy that many of us seemed to like worked at CalPine. He was decent looking and had a very mellow demeanor. Strangely, he didn't identify any of us as people he wanted to e-mail. I can only wonder what he was looking for.

One of the more annoying guys was this sportscaster. The minute he sat down with me he asked why Asian men can't date white women. He was very defensive and loud throughout the conversation. The whole thing was so bizarre because it didn't feel like he really wanted to be there. How stupid is it to attend a speed dating event and sound like you're resentful for not being able to attract woman who are nowhere in the building?

I thought there were a couple other nice guys but they seemed rather young. It didn't really matter what I thought since they didn't match me. This one guy was really trying hard with our group. After the event was over he sat with us as we filled out our final match selections. It was a little annoying that he kept trying to see if we picked him. Not a smooth move.

The results came back quickly, the next morning in fact. All in all I think I had six names. I ended up contacting two of them. Maybe there was a third I should have written back but I couldn't remember whether I really wanted to. No more BAARE for me. I would be willing to give C2A another chance, however, because I felt like the mix of people there was better despite the fact I would "date" fewer men.

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