Thursday, November 06, 2008

Up for air

Don't know if anyone's still out there, but I've returned for a little bit. I'm happy to say that I'm now married!

It was pretty those last few weeks before the big day. You always think you have more time and then suddenly you realize there are more things to do that weren't on the list. So yes, Tim and I spent every waking hour that wasn't spent at work, at home designing programs, sewing, typing up instructions, putting together gifts, handling last-minute requests.

The weather cooperated wonderfully. No one could have asked for more perfect weather. At the rehearsal, the sun felt like a heat lamp on the skin. Thankfully, the weather report was accurate in predicting that the temperature would drop to a very agreeable 74 F for Saturday. There was only the slightest breeze to blow papers, hair, or veils. Everyone was amazed at our beautiful backdrop.


The only wrenches thrown into the mix were the parents. Tim's family wanted to have a private lunch and did not want to come down to the hotel for photos in the morning. Because of this last-minute change, we did not think about the fact that the boutonnieres and corsages needed to be transported to the ceremony. Hence, only my family wore flowers during the wedding. We didn't realize this error until we got back to our hotel room and found a shopping bag full of flowers next to the door. Oops.

My mother was a more thorny problem. Basically, we accept the fact that she was looking for excuses to dislike Tim's family. (They aren't good enough for me in her eyes because they are a different ethnicity and she strongly holds to old country prejudices.) The rehearsal dinner was a nightmare. The Chinese banquet place essentially tried to squeeze out a little more money by short-changing my mother-in-law. We had been promised four tables seating about 10 people each. Instead, they squeezed us into three 12-15 person tables. Then they proceeded to only serve enough food for 10-12 people. My mother immediately came over and yelled at me for embarrassing her in front of the relatives.

Being at my breaking point from general wedding stress, I couldn't help but start crying. I lost my appetite for half the meal. It took numerous conversations between my dad, my mother-in-law, her Chinese friend, and my aunt before my mom could at least calm down. Did it even occur to her how much she was embarrassing me by making such a fuss? I think she blames my in-laws for being cheap rather than realizing the restaurant manager was trying to pull a fast one. I don't think I saw her smile all night. Thank goodness for my reasonable, patient, and loving father.

There's never enough time to talk to everyone, but I feel like I was at least able to say a few words to all my friends over the course of the evening. Tim and I did our best to make sure that we ate most of our dinner. We managed to stay on schedule and still have fun.

More details later...

7 comments:

Anna May Won't said...

um, do you and i have the same mom? ;)

oy, i think that was the biggest stress for me too - dealing with families and esp parents. my mom too looked for excuses to dislike my in-laws, who were equally demanding. i remember at my engagement dinner my ex's aunts gave me the cold shoulder b/c they were mad at their brother, my ex's father, but of course i had no idea why these women who were once nice to me were suddenly so mean. they also didn't talk to my relatives at all. in fact, my aunt thought they didn't speak english. then my mom got mad b/c they didn't give an egagement gift, and she thought the necklace and other jewelry my ex's mother gave me seemed cheap (they actually were, haha).

anyway, i'm glad overall it went well though, and that you had *some* people on your side! :) congrats!!!

Sitcomgirl said...

So that's where you've been! Congrats! What a bad restaurant though for pulling that.

Lost said...

Congratulations on your wedding! While I know the family stuff at the dinner was a bit thorny, it sounds like overall it was great! I look forward to hearing more about it!

teahouse said...

Many congratulations!! The most important thing is that it's over, and you're married now! I remember after my wedding, just feeling so relieved that the planning was done and we could get one with our lives!! The wedding is just the first day, and the best part of marriage is yet to come!

Pandax said...

Thanks everyone! I've missed catching up with all of you. It's so nice to be back.

Megan said...

Congratulations!

Nicky said...

Congratulations. Welcome back! We're eager for details....